


Unworthy

by orphan_account



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Abusive John Winchester, Alpha Lucifer, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Angst, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Omega Sam, Past Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-10
Updated: 2016-05-11
Packaged: 2018-06-07 15:05:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,433
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6810289
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam Winchester is the shame of his family. As the first Winchester male to ever present Omega his father loathes him and shows it to him too. Despite the hate he experiences at home, and the troubles he has to go through because he’s a flawed Omega too, he manages to move on. Trouble follows him wherever he goes though and after he meets an Alpha in the bar he works at, things take an unexpected turn.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first A/B/O fic and it will not include smut, just fyi. This doesn't focus on this part of the dynamics, but at the characters themselves.

Things have never been easy for Sam, not since he presented Omega at least. A shame for his Alpha father, and he felt for his brother too, he was reduced to nothing but a better house maid. His father barely looked at him anymore from this day on, something the thirteen year old boy couldn’t understand. It wasn’t his fault, was it? And nothing had changed. Except that everything had.

Many of his friends in school turned on him, calling him a pup-machine and worse things, teenage Alphas and Betas who had no idea that Sam would have given everything he had just to be like them. No, it wasn’t easy, nothing was from this moment on. He was still good in school; and apart from that he ran the household and was degraded whenever there was a chance. His brother Dean tried his best to keep their father’s disappointment away from him, but Sam knew that he was the disgrace of the Winchester family. No boy ever presented Omega in their family, only Sam dared to.

Things got a little easier when their father left one night and never returned, but it was only for a little while. Dean had worked as a mechanic, an Alpha true and true, roaring and parading around at times. Sam was envious, he wanted to be like his big brother, but pretending didn’t help. Not even as an Omega he was enough it seemed, because despite him getting the attention of way too many Alphas, the most important thing for an Omega never happened. Sam never went into Heat. At first he assumed he was too young, but, as the years passed and nothing happened, he felt less and less worthy of even existing.

He was eighteen when Dean announced he would move in with his own Omega. He asked Sam to come with them, but the younger one couldn’t stand the thought of being with them and seeing how a true Omega should be. So in the end, Dean left and Sam buried himself in his house for almost a whole year. Being an Omega was one thing, he had accepted that over the time. Not going into Heat, however, was something entirely different. What was he worth if he couldn’t go into Heat? Which Alpha would ever take an Omega so flawed? He tried everything, from homemade remedies he found on the internet to countless doctor’s visits, nothing changed. The doctors told him he was healthy, that they couldn’t explain it themselves.

It took another two years for Sam to accept the fact that this was just how he was. He made a few new friends, all other Omegas who had no problem with their Heat, but he wasn’t really happy. There were days when he had to fight Alphas off, who thought an unclaimed Omega would be easy prey. Since he had trained with his brother for half his life though, he managed to win easily against them. It made nothing better of course, as it only showed him one thing: He was a tool to be used. A broken tool.

Still, he made his way through college, paid with his work as a bartender and part-time model for the art department, and he did it with his head held high. Sam Winchester was the Omega with no Heat, everyone knew that by the time he graduated, but he tried not to let it get to him. Once the diploma was in his pocket he visited Dean and his mate, telling them he would try his luck elsewhere. He wanted a fresh start, a new life where he could forget about all the bad things happening. He couldn’t be an Alpha, or even a Beta, but that didn’t stop him. The day he left he cried himself to sleep in a cheap motel room on the highway, a taste of how the following months would be. Still, he didn’t give up, couldn’t if he wanted to prove that he was worth _something_.

Coincidence or not, Sam ended up in Los Angeles. He scored an intern position at a lawyer’s office, covering the costs for his tiny flat with bartending in the evening again. The job didn’t pay, yet, but he was cherished in this position, both for his knowledge and his passion. His boss knew about his troubles, of course an unmated Omega would be recognized by an unmated Alpha, but he never made any attempt on him, which he was more than glad about. At night things were different, but he learned how to defend himself from violence and mating attempts after such a long time.

It wasn’t a good life, but it was better at least. All Sam truly wanted was an Alpha who would accept him the way he was, but this wish was a childish one and he knew it. It took him two more years, until he was twenty-three, until things took an unexpected turn. Sam still worked nightshift at the bar, even though he was paid for his job in the lawyer’s office by now. He grew to like the place and his co-workers, and a little extra money was never a bad thing in L.A.

One Saturday, already way past midnight, an Alpha entered the bar. Of course it was nothing new for Alphas to hang around in bars and Sam was used to their scent and their grabby hands, however, this one was different. The moment Sam caught his smell he felt his stomach twist and looked up, meeting eyes so blue as if he looked right into the sky. The cloth he held in his hand fell on the counter and he stepped back a little, overwhelmed by this scent that seemed to be all around him.

The Alpha in question, a broad shouldered, blond guy in his mid-thirties, looked at him, without any surprise in his eyes. He probably thought it was his appearance that intimidated the younger one so much, not this sharp and spikey scent that seemed to fill the whole room.

“Gimme a beer, would you?” He asked, his voice a deep rasp. Sam swallowed, but the lump in his throat didn’t go away, only got more intense.

_Jesus fucking Christ!_

Sam felt hot and cold, unable to speak or even make a sound. He forced himself to step away, toward his co-worker Meg, but could barely make it past her. The young woman’s head flew up as soon as Sam was close, her eyes narrowing.

“You alright, Sammy?” She asked. Sam shook his head, a squeaking sound leaving his throat.

“S-S-Stomach.” He pressed out.

“Take a break, honey.” Meg said and tried to smile. She patted Sam’s arm and shoved him to the side, towards the private rooms. “I’ll take over.”

Sam peeked over his shoulder when she pushed him through the swinging door, his eyes widening when he noticed the Alpha was looking at him _too_. Then the door swung shut behind him, leaving the brunette alone with the weird feeling in his stomach. He stared at the door for a few minutes, trying to calm himself down somehow. The heavy scent was still there, but now it was less intense. He knew an Alpha’s scent was affecting an Omega when they were in Heat, but he wasn’t, so what on earth just happened? The man wasn’t ugly, far from that, but he wasn’t Sam’s type at all. Handsome, yes, but not attractive in the common sense.

The next ten minutes Sam spent walking up and down the room, trying to figure out why he felt so strange before. He _still_ did, but he had control over himself now at least. It was as if someone cut all connections to his brain and he was left unable to think. Every now and then he peeked through the door, always finding this unknown Alpha at the spot he left him at, sipping on his beer and silent.

“Sammy!” Meg almost slammed the door into Sam’s face, who had spied outside again, when she came looking for him. To his luck Sam jumped back fast enough to prevent a lot of damage. “Feelin’ better?” She asked.

“A little.” Sam said and ran a hand through his hair. “This guy, did he say something?”

“Who, blondie?” Meg chuckled and shook her head. “Just asked if you were alright. Pretty sure he thinks he scared the shit out of you.”

“He _did_!” Sam hissed. “His scent… I had a total blackout!”

“Really?” Meg huffed and peeked out of the door like Sam before. “I didn’t smell anything.”

“But _I_ did.” Sam insisted and sighed.

“Hey, he just surprised you.” Meg smiled at him and stroke over his arm. “Just go out, do your job and you’ll see he’s alright. And if he tries jumping your bones I’ll fight him off.” She winked before leaving the room. Sam couldn’t hold in a chuckle when he followed her, scolding himself for overreacting like this.

The scent hit him hard again, but this time he was prepared for it and managed to keep himself together. He tried his best to look confident when he walked over to the man again, the smile on his face almost real.

“Hey kid, you’re good?” The man asked. Sam nodded and took a deep breath.

“Yeah, sorry about that. I’m not running away normally, I felt sick, that’s all.” He said, trying not to reveal this weak lie already.

“Thought I scared you away, happens sometimes.” The man chuckled, a deep sound that made Sam’s smile a little brighter, and took another sip from his bottle.

“You’re not _that_ scary, dude. Sorry to burst your bubble.” Sam laughed.

He liked the guy somehow. He wasn’t so intimidating at all when he talked, more like a big teddy bear than a grizzly, Sam thought. But then again he had met Alphas who played nice before, only to find out how violent they truly were. There was no reason to believe this one was any different, no matter his scent.

“Still, I’m sorry. Get yourself a beer, it’s on me.”

“Are you bribing me to forgive you?”

“Nah, just an apology.”

Sam chuckled, reached for one of the beer bottles and opened it.

“Thank you, then.” He said and tipped it against the man’s.

“I’m Lucifer, by the way. Or you can call me Luce, whatever.” The man said. Sam’s smile widened as he took a sip and put the bottle down.

“Sam, nice to meet you.”

As the night went on and Sam gave out orders and chatted with some of the customers like he usually did, something always drew him back to Lucifer. He couldn’t tell what it was, but he felt less and less weird around him, even got used to his scent after a while and liked the effect it had on him. He wasn’t lightheaded or dizzy, it just made him feel warm somehow; and that was nice.

It was three in the morning when Meg told Sam he could go home, she would take care of locking the bar tonight. Sam didn’t mind, he was tired and looked forward to a day off, with lots of time to sleep in.

“You’re going?” Lucifer asked when Sam came back and threw his jacket over his shoulder.

“Yeah.” He sighed. “Hate to leave so late at night, but at least it’s not raining cats and dogs again.”

“Scared someone could get to you at night?” Lucifer asked and raised a brow. Sam nodded.

“Wouldn’t be the first time sadly. Last month I barely got away from three Alphas trying to have their fun with me.” He shook his head in disgust. “What is it with Alphas and not standing an unmated Omega without trying to claim them anyways? It’s scary.”

“Never got that either.” Lucifer huffed and emptied his bottle. He jumped off the stool and smiled. “I could take you home? Just to make sure no one tries anything tonight.”

Sam gave him an almost horrified look, causing Lucifer to back away a little.

“Or not!” He said quickly, raising his hands. “I wouldn’t do anything, you know that, right?”

Sam wished he _could_ know. Lucifer seemed like a nice guy and he didn’t want to think he could try to pull him into the bushes along the way and simply take him; but he couldn’t prevent the fear from creeping in. Alpha stayed Alpha, no matter how nice he was. He might be nice, but he was controlled by his knot like all other Alphas for sure.

“I’d rather go alone, sorry, Luce.” Sam mumbled and looked down at his feet. He didn’t like turning Lucifer’s offer down, but he had to.

“Can’t blame you.” Lucifer said assuring, but Sam heard that he was disappointed a little. “I didn’t mean to throw you off. Just wanted to help.”

“It’s fine, really. I appreciate your offer, but I barely know you, so…” Sam shrugged. It was all said to be honest. He thanked Lucifer again for his help, shaking his hand, and left the bar.

It was a warm night and the streets were lightened enough for Sam to feel safe, for a while at least. He wasn’t living directly next door to the bar, but luckily not on the other side of the city either. Five blocks and a small park were all that separated him from his bed now. He didn’t forget Lucifer while he walked, but he forgot about his offer shortly after the first block. His thoughts back home already he entered the park, hoping for a peaceful Sunday, hopefully with some reading and a nice hot bath. Sam didn’t pay attention to his surroundings, didn’t even hear the branch that broke behind him; definitely stepped on. Only when it was too late he remembered Lucifer; and wished he would have accepted his offer.

Sam crossed the bridge in the park, already seeing the street lamp at the exit he would reach soon, when someone grabbed his wrist and twisted his arm around. He yelped in surprise, only to have his mouth covered the second he made a sound. Sam’s eyes widened when he heard a voice groaning into his ear, dangerous and dooming at the same time.

“Don’t make a sound and I won’t hurt you too much.”

Sam felt tears rolling down his cheeks, but no matter how much he struggled, he couldn’t get out of the harsh grip. With each movement he risked his shoulder being dislocated, not to talk about the pain the man, definitely a horny Alpha, caused him. Sam wasn’t weak or small, in fact he was very tall and a good fighter, but being held like this took his advantage away and left him almost defenseless. All he could do was hope to get a chance to scratch or bite this sucker in the right place somehow.

Sweaty and strong hands grabbed Sam’s waist and pulled him away from the bridge, deeper into the park again. Sam tried to make a noise, screamed into the man’s hand and kept punching him, without any success though. Not letting go of Sam’s mouth, the man rubbed against his back, making disgusting sounds of pleasure. All Sam wanted to do was throw up, but this would mean choking on his own vomit.

Suddenly the hand was ripped from his mouth with force, the grip on his wrist was gone, and he screamed. He started running without even thinking about it, just wanting to get away from the guy as fast as he could, towards the light. He heard muffled noises behind him, punches and then something that stopped him immediately – his name.

Sam turned around, not sure what was going on right now, and saw Lucifer, holding a very bloody man by the collar of his shirt. He walked over to the Omega, dragging the other guy with him. He was still conscious, but Sam couldn’t imagine how it was possible. His face was nothing more than swollen mess, the one eye that wasn’t bloody and shut looking at Lucifer, panicking. This made Sam look at Lucifer’s face and he saw fear in his blue eyes.

“Sam, you’re alright?” Lucifer asked when he reached the younger one. Sam shook his head and glared at the man again.

“Where did you come from?” He asked, barely believing his luck. Without Lucifer he wouldn’t stand now for sure.

“I followed you.” Sam’s head flew up at Lucifer’s words and he took a step back. “Just to keep an eye on you!” Lucifer quickly defended his actions, shaking the other guy in the process to make a grunting sound.

“Donf kill me fleafe!”

Lucifer rolled his eyes and pulled the beaten up guy into a standing position, before pushing him hard. The other stumbled backwards, struggling to stay on his feet, but ultimately failing.

“Get the hell away from this one and never come close to him again!” Lucifer growled at him. “If I so much as _smell_ you near him again I will cut your balls off and force you to eat them, understood?”

Sam watched, half amused and half terrified, how the man nodded and crawled backwards. It took him a while to get back on his feet, but the second he stood he ran for his life.

“So, you stalked me?” Sam asked and Lucifer turned back to him. “I told you not to take me home and you followed me?”

“Should I have not?” Lucifer asked, a little hurt. “This guy didn’t want to take you out for dinner!”

“No, he wanted to get into my pants.” Sam huffed and straightened the jacket over his shoulders. “I’m not mad that you followed me, okay?” He then said, smiling. “Can I accept your offer now?”

“You think I’d let you walk alone?” Lucifer asked and came over. He wrapped his arm around Sam’s shoulder, but the Omega wasn’t thrown off by this at all. The other guy’s touch had been disgusting and forceful, Lucifer’s was caring and gentle.

“Thank you.” Sam sighed.

With Lucifer guarding him Sam wasn’t even looked at again this night, no wonder with such a dangerous looking Alpha around. The last time this happened he had been shaking for hours after. This time, however, he knew he was safe for the rest of the way. Lucifer could be just acting of course, but he didn’t think so. The way he beat this guy up, the way he looked around for any danger – this wasn’t acting.

In front of Sam’s apartment building the Omega fiddled his keys out, but hesitated.

“You know, it’s late and… I mean, if you’d like to stay, I have space?” Sam knew he sounded stupid, especially after a situation like he just escaped, but not asking seemed rude somehow.

“Are you sure? I can go home, no biggie.” Lucifer said and tilted his head a little.

“You just saved me from being raped, I think I owe you a place to stay, don’t you think?”

“You don’t owe me _anything_ , Sam.” Lucifer said serious. He longed into his pocket, pulling out a small business card that he handed the Omega. “I wanted you home safe, you are home. If you want to thank me, give me a call sometime. I’ll take you out for lunch, if you want to.”

Sam took the little white card with shaking fingers, not yet looking at it. He just stared at Lucifer, confused by this new behavior of an Alpha. His whole life Alphas, and even Betas, had been violent, demanding and cruel towards him. It was hard to believe this one was different, but apparently it was true.

“Good night, Sam.” Lucifer said and then, to Sam’s surprise, he leaned forward and placed a soft and gentle kiss on his cheek. Without waiting for an answer the Alpha turned around and, hands buried in his pockets, walked along the block, god knew where.

“Good night, Lucifer…” Sam mumbled when he was out of sight, unsure why he waited so long. He turned the little card and smiled slightly.

_Lucifer Morningstar  
Photographer_

Beneath, a cellphone number was written, the handwriting neat and tidy. Sam would have expected a man like Lucifer to have a sloppy handwriting, but this was as surprising as the man was himself. He let the card slide into his pocket, before opening the door and walking up to his apartment. As he walked into the empty living room and threw his jacket over a chair, he wondered why Lucifer refused to come. He wouldn’t have asked him to share a bed of course, but maybe the Alpha knew sleeping near an unmated Omega was dangerous? Sam didn’t know, but he wished Lucifer would have stayed a little longer. He wouldn’t have minded less sleep just to talk to him a bit more.

Before going to bed, Sam made himself a quick microwave meal. Usually he ate at the bar, even if it was only a sandwich, but today he was too distracted to even think about it. It had been nice talking to Lucifer though. He was someone who actually had things to _say_ , rather than just agreeing with Sam so he might end up next to him during the night. Sam really considered giving him a call the next day. It was a nice thought to fall asleep to, seeing Lucifer again.


	2. Chapter 2

Sam slept in the next morning, as he had planned, and woke up refreshed a lot more than the last days. Since it was his day off, both from the lawyer’s office and the bar, he decided to start it by cleaning up his apartment. Normally Sam was a rather picky person when it came to his apartment, but the last weeks had been so busy that he barely had time to sleep long enough.

After one hour of making his way through the two small rooms, he managed to make it look presentable again. While cleaning up the kitchen, however, he noticed that he barely had any food left. Which brought his thoughts back to Lucifer and the offer he made him the night before.

Could he risk it? Could he actually call him and ask for this date, because it surely would be one?

He didn’t want to use Lucifer of course, he _wanted_ to meet with him again, outside of work preferably. After debating a few minutes and twisting the white business card in his hand, Sam ignored his doubts and dialed the handwritten number on it. The phone started to ring and Sam was nervous suddenly.

“Hello?” Lucifer’s sleepy voice came over the speaker and Sam immediately felt ashamed.

“Hey, uhm, it’s me, Sam. Remember me?” He asked a little shy. Lucifer chuckled.

“Rings a bell. Weren’t you the guy I stopped from mating last night?”

“Pretty much, yeah.” Sam couldn’t hide a grin. “You said something about having lunch together?”

“Are you serious?” Lucifer seemed surprised.

“Only if you weren’t joking. If you were: I dialed the wrong number.”

“No, no! Of course! I just thought you weren’t interested last night.”

“It’s difficult, you see, but lunch isn’t exactly a proposal, right? And I liked talking to you.”

“True. How about I pick you up and you chose the place?”

“Sounds good.” Sam smiled from ear to ear. “Can you be here by twelve?”

“I’ll be there. See you later, Sam.”

“See you later, Luce.”

When Sam hung up he felt relieved and excited at the same time. Sure, it was some kind of date, but even though he hated dating, this time he didn’t mind at all. His brother had always made fun of him for not even _looking_ for an Alpha, for probably staying unmated until he died, but Sam didn’t care. He never actively looked, that was true, but it wasn’t because he didn’t want to find an Alpha. He just knew he was flawed and everyone else knew too, so no one approached him of course. Now, however, he found someone he actually _liked_. So, why shouldn’t he get to know Lucifer a little better? It was no crime after all.

Since it was already ten, Sam took a shower and searched his closet for some clean clothes. He never took so long to make himself ready and it felt a little weird when he was finally done. Over and over again he told himself that this was just a lunch and that he shouldn’t expect anything coming from it, but it was nearly impossible.

At twelve, Sam walked down and waited for Lucifer in front of the building. It was a calm day, with little people in the streets and a warm breeze brushing through Sam’s shoulder-long hair as he leaned against the rail with his eyes closed. He didn’t even notice that someone walked up to him, only when his face was cupped gently and a kiss was placed on his forehead he opened his eyes, smiling.

“Eager, aren’t we?” Sam chuckled before pressing a kiss on Lucifer’s cheek.

“I’m sorry, you looked so peaceful, I couldn’t resist.” Lucifer smiled.

“Forgiven. Now, still up for lunch?”

“That’s why I’m here. You lead the way.”

Sam had decided on a place before, a small restaurant at the corner nearby. They served Italian food and, most important, it was never too full. The way was only a few minutes, which they spent in silence. Once they found a nice table inside and sat down, Sam relaxed a little.

“It’s nice here. Your typical first date place?” Lucifer asked a little amused and longed for the menu.

“I don’t date normally, but I like the food here.” Sam shrugged. Sometimes he forgot that other people had dates and often had special places to take their partners to, like his brother.

“How come you don’t date?” Lucifer asked surprised. “I don’t want to overstep a line, but you’re a good looking guy. It’s hard to believe no one would be interested in you for a date.”

Sam put the menu in his hands down and signed the waiter, without answering. He ordered a bottle of wine for them, as well as a salad and sandwich for himself, while Lucifer settled with a pizza. When the waitress was gone Sam sighed and looked back at Lucifer.

“I’ll be honest with you. I told you its difficult; and it is. I can’t get into Heat.”

“Really?” Lucifer blinked a few times. “Like, never?”

“I never did at least. I was a burden already for being an Omega for my dad, being unable to go into Heat just adds to it. I don’t mind myself, but can you see why I’m not dating now?”

“Yeah…”

The two were silent for a while, just in time for the waitress to bring the wine and leave again. Sam didn’t plan to tell Lucifer right at the beginning, killing every mood that might come up, but he thought the Alpha deserved to know the truth. He didn’t want Lucifer to think he was hiding anything from him.

“You know, this doesn’t make you less of an Omega, right?” Lucifer asked eventually, surprising Sam once more.

“How does it not? It’s the only worth I _have_ in this society, without it I’m useless!”

“I don’t think so. You can’t have pups, so what? Do you want them?”

Sam had to think about this question for a moment. His whole life he had been taught that an Omega was supposed to have pups to be worth something, but he never asked himself if he actually _wanted_ any.

“I don’t know, I should, right?” He finally mumbled.

“If you don’t want to, no. You’re good looking, Sam. You’re intelligent and charming, why should this define you?”

“Because –“ Sam wanted to protest, justify that he thought so low of himself, but he saw in Lucifer’s eyes that no matter what he would bring up – the Alpha would tell him he was wrong.

“Heat or not, you’re a great Omega and every Alpha should be proud to have someone like you.”

“But I can never mate… without Heat…” Sam looked down at his hands, trying not to cry in front of Lucifer. What he had said made his stomach feel fuzzy, even though Lucifer probably didn’t even mean it this way.

“An Alpha can still claim you and mark you as his. And does it really matter?” Lucifer asked. Sam slowly looked up, not knowing an answer. To him it mattered, it was all that mattered for an Omega. In the end though, he simply shook his head, trying to smile.

“Maybe not. I just thought you should know.” Sam shrugged.

The waitress brought their food orders and for a while both Sam and Lucifer were silent, eating the delicious food. Sam was surprised when Lucifer offered him a slice of his pizza, but gladly accepted. It was good, he couldn’t deny it. After both their plates were empty and each of them had a glass of wine in their hands; Sam spoke again.

“I know this is only a friendly lunch, but I enjoy it a lot.” He said, smiling a little.

“What makes you think this isn’t a date?” Lucifer asked and raised a brow.

“It is?”

“Of course. If you want it to be one that is.”

Sam emptied his glass, a flush of red on his cheeks. He was more shocked than embarrassed, given he told him about his problem and Lucifer still considered this an actual _date_. Could it really be that he didn’t care about this and was interested in him for who he _was_?

“I’d like it to be one.” Sam finally said, still blushing.

“I hoped you’d say that.” Lucifer answered, emptying his own glass now.

They sat there for a while longer, talking about the weather and the city and whatnot, just every day small talk. It was fun talking to Lucifer, who wasn’t reserved at all and was genuinely interested in the things Sam had to say. Soon they headed to the topics of their jobs and Sam told him about his wish to be a lawyer one day, a risky wish for an Omega, but not completely impossible.

“I know it takes a lot of work, but I can make it.” Sam said, visibly proud. “My boss said I have the balls for it.”

“I bet.” Lucifer grinned. “You’ll be ruling the court rooms one day.”

“So you don’t think it’s a stupid goal?”

“Why should it be? You’re clever and your clients would profit from your passion a lot. You should do it.”

Sam smiled at Lucifer’s words. He didn’t expect him to be so supporting, but it didn’t feel like a lie.

Lucifer insisted to pay for their lunch, Sam couldn’t even protest. Now the restaurant was getting crowded though, so the two decided to go back to Sam’s apartment for some coffee. It was quiet there and they had time to keep talking. A short lunch date turned into them spending the whole afternoon together, sharing stories and laughing, and not a single minute Sam felt uncomfortable.

Turned out Lucifer had three brothers, one older and two younger ones. He only got along with one though, his youngest brother, whose name was Gabriel. So, Sam told him about his own brother, but left out the envy towards him. After all he always loved Dean and looked up to him, even if he was a dick at times.

“Dean moved in with his mate you said? Isn’t it usually the other way around?” Lucifer asked curious. Sam shrugged, stirring his coffee.

“I think he wanted to get away from me. He won’t admit it, but when I presented Omega he was disappointed, as much as our dad. He just never told me.”

“Your dad was what?” Lucifer asked. Sam was surprised by the disbelief in his voice.

“He showed me what he thought. I’m the first Winchester boy who is not an Alpha and he let me feel that often enough. Dean never did. He hated it, but he was always caring and nice.”

“Son of a bitch!”

This made Sam laugh, as Lucifer was so much more offended than he was by now. Sam was used to being treated like shit, not just from his dad, but most people in general.

“He left when I was sixteen. It got better after that.” Sam threw in, but Lucifer shook his head.

“You were how old when he found out? Fourteen?”

“Thirteen.”

“Alright, thirteen. Telling a thirteen year old boy – who is his son by the way – that he’s useless and you’re ashamed of him just because he’s an Omega is the worst thing someone could do.” Lucifer seemed really angry about this matter. “You don’t do this! He should have told you that you’re not worthless and that you are good the way you are.”

“Well, he didn’t.” Sam had no idea what to say. “He looked at me as if I was a cockroach, forced me to take care of the house on my own and cook, all besides school. Not that he wanted me to go there, he said it was useless, but Dean helped me with that.”

“So, he used you as his housemaid?”

“Kinda, yeah. It’s good now though…”

“No, it’s not good! Sam, don’t you see what he did? Telling you all these things and treating you like shit? No wonder you feel worthless. I wouldn’t be surprised if this was where your problem comes from.”

Sam could only stare at the older one, unable to make a sound. He had never thought about a correlation between these two things, but could it be? The doctor said it wasn’t something physical, so it had to be some sort of mental problem, as his blood and even his genes were completely fine. If Lucifer was right, and the way he said this almost made Sam believe he was, this could change everything.

“Sam, you good?” Lucifer asked. When Sam didn’t react he snipped his fingers in front of the Omega’s face until he finally blinked.

“What?” Sam gasped.

“Are you alright? I thought you’d pass out or something.”

Sam saw the worry in Lucifer’s eyes and immediately regretted being distracted so much. He laid one of his hands on the Alpha’s, smiling.

“I’m fine, really. I just thought you could be right. Like, my dad always talked I had to get pups and do the household and how useless I was and how ashamed he was that I was his son; I was so _scared_ of him. Sometimes, when he drank too much, he would stand at the foot of my bed at night, staring at me for up to an hour. He was too drunk to notice I was awake and he really terrified me, so much I couldn’t sleep afterwards. I thought one night he would just walk up to me and kill the disappointing thing that pretended to be his son.” Lucifer’s eyes widened at Sam’s words, but when he opened his mouth Sam shook his head, shushing him. “I thought he would be proud again if I showed him I can be a good Omega. That I can do all those things, you know? I studied until I fell asleep over my books, kept the house clean and cooked, I even accepted the fact that I’d stay home forever and raise pups.”

“Sam…”

“No, you don’t understand! I was so stressed out all the time, I wanted him to accept me so badly. And when it was time and I didn’t go into Heat… everything I worked so hard for was wasted. He looked at me and didn’t see me anymore. The nightly visits stopped, he didn’t talk to me and one morning he was gone and never came back.”

“It wasn’t your fault that he couldn’t accept you the way you are, you know that, right?” Lucifer said, his hand wrapping around Sam’s, unnoticed by both men. “He was an idiot for not appreciating the great son he had. Just look at yourself! You do your thing and you do it great!”

“It took me years to do that, even now I ask myself what he would think of me.”

“Don’t. He’s not worth your time, Sam.”

“I try not to. I really try, Lucifer.”

“I know you do.” Lucifer said.

When Sam didn’t answer, just grabbed the Alpha’s hand a little tighter, he leaned forward a little. Sam had no idea what Lucifer was up to, but when he felt his soft lips brushing over his own, he didn’t care much. It wasn’t even a kiss, not really, it was too short. Sam still closed his eyes, cherishing this new and good feeling rising in him. And when Lucifer did it again, a real kiss this time, he let him.

This wasn’t what Sam had planned at all, to be honest he was scared of something like this might happen. Somehow it felt good though, almost tender and not at all hoe he imagined it. Lucifer knew Sam was scared, he could feel his hand shaking around his own, and was very careful while kissing him. When he finally pulled back, too soon for Sam’s liking, the Omega had to fight to even open his eyes. He met Lucifer’s, a smile on the Alpha’s lips, faint and gentle.

Sam had no words in him, but when Lucifer’s hand cupped his cheek, he closed his eyes again and leaned into the tender touch he never felt before. He noticed now that Lucifer’s scent had changed too and this time it made his head feel dizzy. It was a warm scent now, arousing even – if he ever felt something arousing it was definitely this. This brought up a problem though, a serious one. He had no idea what to do _now_.

Lucifer said something, but Sam only heard the sound of his voice, not the words he spoke. Slowly he opened his eyes again, beaming at him.

“Huh?”

“I should go now, it’s getting late.”

Sam opened his eyes fully, shocked by this sudden choice.

“What, why?” He gasped when Lucifer took his hand away too. He felt like he would cry soon.

“Don’t you feel it? It’s too fast, if I don’t go I’ll jump your bones within the next minutes and I don’t want to do that.” Lucifer explained calm, but his words left no protest.

“You… you don’t –“

“No, Sam. Hell, I like you, okay? I don’t want to rush anything when I know you’re not ready.”

There was a hot burn in Sam’s chest he couldn’t define, he only knew it hurt. He understood Lucifer’s worries though, he felt that something was happening with him, his hormones gave him away. And he wasn’t ready, maybe he would never be. Sam just wished Lucifer wouldn’t leave already.

“I will call you tomorrow, just tell me when. This isn’t goodbye forever, promised.” Lucifer said and Sam nodded. This was the last thing he wanted, but he knew it was better to separate for now.

“I have my phone with me, I’ll pick up.” He said.

Lucifer stood up, Sam following him silently. He brought the Alpha to the door, but when he opened it Lucifer didn’t move. Confused, Sam looked at him.

“I had fun today, Sam. Don’t think I want to do, because I really don’t.”

“I know.” Sam sighed. “But it’s better. We’ll see us again, right?”

“Nothing could stop me.” Lucifer smiled and leaned in, placing another soft kiss on Sam’s cheek. While doing this, he brushed over the corner of his lips, making the Omega smile slightly.

When they said goodbye Sam wasn’t that sad anymore. After all Lucifer just wanted to prevent himself from doing something Sam might not want. He didn’t want to hurt him and this thought gave Sam hope.


	3. Chapter 3

Sam still couldn’t believe it weeks later, but he had been right about Lucifer. The Alpha was different from the others he met in his life. For the first time someone didn’t give a second thought about what society expected of him as an Omega and how he was flawed – Sam was treated like a person. Lucifer was very charming and never forced anything on Sam. He always made sure that the younger one felt comfortable and had fun, no matter if they were walking through the park or had lunch together; or even just cuddled on the couch together, watching movies.

They never really said it, but they slipped into some kind of relationship that, given Sam’s horrible insecurities and his little problem, was the best thing ever happening to him. Of course Sam was still insecure about intimacy, but Lucifer was very kind about it. Over and over again he told Sam that he didn’t care about his problem, that he cherished him for who he was and not for this. It was hard to believe, but Sam _really_ tried.

Lucifer took tiny steps and Sam was very glad about it. He knew for a fact that Alphas usually didn’t treat male Omegas with so much respect and kindness, so it was a great surprise for him. A male Omega was usually just a trophy, added to a female for variety and fun. Lucifer, however, was not like those Alphas.

Whenever the two were outside though, and they were quite often since Sam’s apartment was very small and Lucifer lived in a shared apartment, Sam noticed the looks the Alpha received. Omegas and Betas, both male and, even worse, female, turned around when they passed by, their eyes sparkling and their mouths often slightly open. Lucifer had an effect on them that Sam could only describe as stunning. It didn’t help him at all, as he would always get more and more self-conscious when he noticed how young some of them were and how amazing they looked.

The problem wasn’t that Sam wasn’t attractive himself, but he knew all of these other Omegas and Betas didn’t share his problem. After they dated for over a month and still didn’t end up mating it got worse and worse. Lucifer was such an amazing and perfect Alpha, he deserved someone who could give him everything – not someone broken and flawed.

Things could have been working out, Sam knew it, if the worst of all wouldn’t have happened. One day, almost two months after he met Lucifer for the first time, he was called into his boss’s office during work. He had no idea what he wanted, but it was clear from the first second that he was in trouble.

“I’ve gotten some serious complaints from customers, Mr. Winchester,” his boss said. Sam shifted in his chair, realizing which customer he talked about. This specific one had tried to flirt with him and tried seducing him during their appointment, ending up in Sam getting him take out by security.

“Sir, it wasn’t my fault that –“

“No.” His boss raised his hand, stopping Sam dead. “I agreed to employ you under the condition you wouldn’t cause any trouble. Given now our customers complain about you I can’t keep this up.”

“You’re… firing me?” Sam couldn’t believe it. He was _good_ at his job, there was no _reason_ to fire him!

“I have no other choice, I’m sorry. It’s killing our good reputation.”

“But… sir, this man tried to jump my bones in my own office! Should I have _let_ him?”

His boss shook his head, pointing at the door.

“I’m sorry, Sam. Maybe this just isn’t for you. An unmated Omega in the court room, we both know how this will end, don’t we?”

Sam had no words left. He simply stood up and left the office, trying not to break out into tears right away. Without a word he walked to his office, ignoring his co-worker Abby, who asked what happened, and emptied his desk. His eyes were already burning, but he wouldn’t fall this far, no. This wasn’t fair, he did nothing wrong by having the client taken out. All he did was trying to keep himself _safe_.

With his case full of the things he had on his desk, and a check in his hand to cover the rest of this month’s payment, he stepped out of the lawyer’s office. It was only ten in the morning, but his life was already crushed. Without the confidence he had built up during the last weeks, Sam made his way home, silent tears streaming down his cheeks. All he wanted to do was curl up into a ball and never move again. Without this job he could never afford staying in the city, not with the rent for his apartment being raised a year before. His job at the bar would never pay for it and if he asked for it to be raised they’d probably kick him out too. It was all going to ruins…

When he entered his apartment Sam didn’t even bother closing the door properly, hoping that maybe some horny and violent Alpha would just come in and slit his throat or whatever, before falling onto his bed and give into the breakdown that was inevitable. He simply cried and sobbed into his pillow, his stomach tightening and his chest hurting from the cut off breaths, unable to stop for even a second. For now he even forgot Lucifer and that he should have probably called him or something; all he could think of was that his dream was shattered and that he could never pick up the pieces.

\----

Lucifer had tried calling Sam several times during the day, both in the office and on his cellphone, but not a single time the Omega had picked up. At noon he was worried, but still hoped he was just busy. Around four in the afternoon, however, he was almost terrified. He had almost fifty unanswered calls by then and decided to ditch the last photo shooting he had for the day. Whatever had happened, he knew Sam never ignored his phone for so long, especially not when he was the one calling.

After canceling the last shoot he almost jumped out of his studio, getting the first free taxi he found and urged the driver to go as fast as he could. All kinds of scenarios played in his head, most of them involving Sam getting into a shitload of trouble with some knot-driven Alpha against his will. He prayed that it wasn’t what happened, but after the encounter Sam had in the park on the day they met he knew it was more than possible.

Once the taxi reached the apartment building and Lucifer paid the driver his worries were changing to panic. He smashed Sam’s doorbell continuously, but he just wouldn’t open the damn door. Finally it _was_ ripped open, but not from Sam.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” A middle aged woman yelled at him, blocking the entrance with her heavy body. Lucifer stared at her, bewildered for a moment. “So? What do you want?”

Without explaining the situation to the woman, fearing that it might cost Sam important moments if anything was happening, he pushed her out of the way and ran upstairs, taking two steps at a time to go faster. He noticed the open door the second he laid his eyes on it and burst through it, calling out for Sam. There was no answer, but Lucifer heard the sounds from the bedroom, silent cries.

“Sammy?” When he saw Sam, cowering next to the bed and his face buried in his arms, he was shocked. The Omega wasn’t raped, as he had feared, he could smell that. But he was in utter despair. “Sammy, what happened? Why didn’t you pick up your phone?”

Lucifer knelt down next to the younger one, freeing his face. He got no resistance, just empty hazel eyes, filled with tears, staring through him. Without hesitation he pulled him into his arms, a hand holding his head against his and cradling his hair.

“Shhh…” Lucifer whispered, placing soft kissed on Sam’s temple. He held him for a long time, not even knowing for how long, there was no way he would let go of him in this situation. He had never seen Sam so devastated, never smelled this heartbreaking scent on him. It felt as if he was giving up and it broke his own heart too, seeing the one he loved like this. “It’s alright, Sam. Whatever it is, we’ll fix it.”

“No one can fix me.” Sam mumbled, turning his head away from the Alpha and wiping his eyes.

Lucifer shifted slightly so he was able to look at Sam again, despite his attempt to prevent this.

“You’re not broken, Sam. How often do I have to tell you that?”

“Tell that my boss! Or, no, tell that my ex-boss!” Sam’s voice was only sad, there was anger in him, yes, but more frustration than that. Lucifer’s eyes widened slightly.

“What? What happened? I thought he supported you?”

Sam huffed and stood up, walking out of the room. Not knowing what was going on now, Lucifer followed him. In the living room Sam picked up random things, books and magazines, even the tv remote, and threw them against the wall as he continued to speak.

“Oh, he did! But apparently his support ends when a client wants to fuck his Omega secretary without consent and he protects his fucking _ass_!” With every word his voice got louder; until he screamed the last one. There were new tears in his eyes now, his hand clutched around a dirty shirt he just picked up, and his face was nothing more than a mask of sorrow and regret.

“He… he didn’t fire you over this, no way.” Lucifer muttered and shook his head.

“But he did! He fucking did!” Sam growled and threw the shirt to the ground. “What the fuck am I supposed to do now? Tell me! As long as I’m like this no one will employ me! Those fuckers will never stop! Stupid fucking Alphas and their fucking knot!” He threw his hands up and plopped on the couch, covering his face.

Lucifer swallowed a lump that tried to build up in his throat. Sam’s words hurt, a lot, even though he knew that the Omega didn’t mean what he said. Not regarding _him_ at least – or so he hoped. Still, he didn’t know what to say to make it better. Sam wasn’t broken, he never thought of him like that. If the Omega didn’t realize this though nothing would change, ever.

“Sam, don’t say such things.” Lucifer finally sighed and sat down next to him. Whatever it was worth, he just couldn’t say nothing.

“It’s true!” Sam insisted, pushing Lucifer away when he tried putting his arm around him. “Unmated, unworthy, flawed! All the time I see it in their faces! You don’t know how it is, you have no fucking idea!”

“Sam…” Lucifer sighed and now forced Sam into his arms, still trying to be as gentle as possible. He carefully stroke over Sam’s neck, letting his fingers run over the soft skin.

“Without Heat I –“

“No.” Lucifer shook his head, smiling at him softly. “Heat doesn’t matter. I can claim you, if you want to.”

“How? It’s not the same.” Sam turned his head away again. “It’s not like _mating_.”

“So?” Lucifer turned Sam’s head back around with his thumb, brushing over his chin. “Is this not where we are going? I don’t want your Heat, Sam. I want _you_.”

“But you deserve someone who isn’t broken,” Sam sniffed, not looking up. “I might never get over this and… you could have all the others out there.”

“I don’t _want_ anyone else, don’t you see that?”

Sam stayed silent, but leaned against Lucifer’s chest instead of trying to flee again. When Lucifer wrapped his arms around him this time, Sam didn’t protest. He just let the Alpha hold him, while sniffing from now and then. Slowly Lucifer managed to calm him down, stroking his back and brushing through his hair, combined with kisses on his head now and then. Still, the Alpha felt bad. He knew this problem was a mental one, but he had no idea what to do to help Sam; other than showing him that it wasn’t something he cared about at least. Sam was still Sam, he was still awesome. With or without Heat, Lucifer wanted him to be _his_ Omega and no one else’s.

“What if I never go into Heat?” Sam asked at one point, his voice filled with fear and doubts.

“Then you don’t.” Lucifer simply answered. “I wouldn’t go away because of something like that.”

“People will make fun of you.”

“Fuck them then.” Lucifer chuckled and pulled Sam up into a quick kiss. “You’re mine, Sammy. I found you all by myself and I’m not gonna give you up so easily.” These words were the first to make Sam actually smile since Lucifer arrived and it made the Alpha feel a lot of relief.

Together the two cleaned up the mess Sam had caused by smashing his things, throwing away all the broken stuff. It wasn’t much, but enough for Sam to realize how much he had flipped out. He also remembered the things he said about Alphas and apologized to Lucifer for it, a guilty look in his eyes.

“Nothing to apologize, don’t worry.” Lucifer waved his words off and stomped the containments of the trashcan down a little, so he could fit more stuff into it. “You’re right. It just happens that I have a low knot drive, so I’m not _that_ eager to fuck around.”

Sam stared at him wide eyed.

“You have what?”

“I never fit into the Alpha scheme that much.” Lucifer laughed and walked over. “My brothers made fun of me for not wanting a mate, but I never bothered. I can do it, I _want_ to actually, but I’m not forgetting myself over my knot.”

“Is that why you’re not minding my problem?” Sam asked.

“It’s just not that important to me.” He shrugged. Again, he laid a hand on Sam’s shoulder with a smile on his face. “This doesn’t have to be about this, you know it.”

“Can… can we still… be together?” Sam mumbled a little embarrassed. “I mean, the other way?”

“If you want to, we can.” Lucifer smiled. “Fuck your stupid boss, how about you’re working for me? You can move into my apartment too, my roommate is moving out soon anyways. I’d rather have you there than anyone else.”

“You’re serious?”

“More than ever before.” Lucifer reached for Sam’s hand and entwined their fingers slowly. “You’re my Omega, Sam. The one I never thought I would want, but I do. I’ll give you anything you want and need.”

“Then – “ Sam swallowed, his heart racing like never before. He knew it wasn’t the same, not like other mates did it, but he didn’t care. He _wanted_ to be his Omega. “Then make me yours for them to know.”

“I thought you’d never say this.”

Lucifer leaned down, gently stroking Sam’s hair away as the Omega tilted his head. When Lucifer’s teeth brushed over his skin Sam shivered a little, causing the Alpha to wrap his arm around his waist, holding him against himself.

“I’ll be gentle, promised.” He whispered and kissed the chosen spot, before slowly sinking his mating fangs into the soft flesh. Sam gasped and clawed his hands into Lucifer’s shoulders, his nails digging into the skin under his shirt. When Lucifer broke the intimate contact, before pulling back, he kissed Sam’s new mark as tender as possible, leaving his lips on it longer than before.

“My Omega.” Lucifer whispered, looking back up into Sam’s eyes. Sam relaxed under his soft gaze, his touch on him losing its grip. Slowly he brought one hand to his new mark, letting his fingers run over the slightly bleeding spot. A smile spread on his lips, content and blissful.

“My Alpha.” Sam whispered back, before Lucifer pulled him back into his arms. This embrace was longing and loving and for the first time in his life Sam wished that a touch would never end.

He had finally found his Alpha.

Finally.


End file.
